


Vivere

by ajaguarsinstinct



Category: Carmilla (Web Series), Carmilla - All Media Types
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-24 16:30:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8379412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ajaguarsinstinct/pseuds/ajaguarsinstinct
Summary: Now that she has a different perception of her senses (and doesn't need to brood nearly as much), Carmilla finds herself enjoying songs that aren't punk-rock.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I had an interesting conversation with my brother a few weeks ago. He dislikes pretty much every genre of music that's not metal or heavy rock, and I asked him if he knew why. He answered saying that that kind of music helps him vent all the frustration he keeps in while working, and I don't even blame him. It made me think about another person who might do the same thing for the same reason, and I thought, what would happen if she isn't so frustrated and broody all the time? What would happen if she starts noticing she doesn't have many reason to stare longingly out of a window anymore?
> 
> This is also inspired by experiences I'm still having. Not quite literally, obviously, but I'm starting to really enjoy music after years of not-so-bright events. This is also the first time I write (and complete) something in six years, so I accept the fact that it might not be a masterpiece. Baby steps, right?
> 
> The song mentioned here is Warm On A Cold Night by Honne. I suggest you play it while reading.

Being able to perceive coldness was one of the many downsides Carmilla found about being human, however getting warmed up by one of your girlfriend's hugs was definitely a positive thing. Another thing that she discovered to like a lot, was getting cozied up under layers and layers of blankets, surrounded by softness, a warm body beside you, while outside the angry bite of December wasn't merciful to anyone.

Though she couldn't fall asleep, nor Laura. Arms and legs intertwined, bodied pressed together in a tight but comfortable hug, only seen by yellow light from the nightstand, covered with a napkin to make it less intense. Carmilla's thoughts went back to the events of that night, a pretty good dinner out with Laura and her father. They made her try seafood for the first time, and her wide-eyed, freaked out reaction made them laugh to tears for whole minutes. At least, now she could erase slimy living things from the list of foods she could like. Aside from that, she actually had fun. She enjoyed talking with them about completely normal and mundane things, savoring the new found flavors on her tongue.

Sherman's home was close enough to the restaurant to return back by foot. He quickly said goodnight and went to sleep, his snoring audible from his room that was just beside Laura's. And there they were, both aware of the other's breath, with Carmilla's hand slowly caressing her girlfriend's hair from base to tip, and Laura's head comfortably snuck under the other's chin, eyelashes lightly tickling the other's skin. 

They were surrounded by a particular mood that neither felt before. The kind of mood late in the night where you feel content in silence, whispering if you really have to talk, maybe even afraid that if you would speak a word too loudly you would ruin everything. Only soft sounds were allowed in those moments, like their faint heartbeats and breaths, and a car passing by every once in a while. You would think someone could fall asleep easily in this mood, however they were both wide awake. They didn't even bothered to know for how long they've been awake exactly.

“Can't sleep either?” Whispered Laura.

Carmilla just nodded when the other raised her face enough to look at her in the eyes. “What about a late night drive?” 

The brunette smirked. “I think your father could have a heart attack if he wakes up and finds his daughter missing again.”

“We won't be away for long, half an hour tops.”

It didn't take long for both to be convinced, experiencing the weird need to go out again and feel something in the silent night. After quietly dressing with the same clothes, Laura took her father's car keys and sat on the driver's seat, being the only one with a driver license. She turned on the radio, lowering the volume right away, to avoid disturbing the night, and decided to take all the long, smooth roads. They both remained in a comfortable silence as Carmilla looked at the faint lights of distant towns, or the still turned on signs of closed shops. It was little past 3 AM when Laura lowered the window at her side slightly, just enough to hear the sound of the tires as they passed over wet asphalt, and Carmilla decided to rest her head on the headrest, closing her eyes and letting the sounds relax her even more. Still not enough to fall asleep.

And in that second, the deep voice of the radio host introduced the following song. The volume was loud enough to let them listen to the music and actually hear the lyrics, and Carmilla was silently amazed at how the words matched to what she felt for the girl right next to her. Her left foot started tapping on the dark rug, without her consent. Some parts of the song were even a little bit too loud for the silence they were enjoying, but it was definitely tolerable. In that calm state of mind, it wasn't difficult for Carmilla to accept that it was probably the first song she enjoyed that wasn't punk-rock, or really loud for that matter. She let her fingers tap on her left thigh, as the car followed the lines of soft, long bumps on the road, modelled with time by the clay underneath. Even the up-and-down rocking of the car was gentle, not making that much of a sound.

She used to listen to heavy music to help her vent the frustration that she couldn't let go in any other way. Yes, at the time she had angry sex with someone if she had to, but after a few hours the slicing feeling would come back, and she would always try to at least ignore it by occupying her mind with books, and music so loud she couldn't even hear her thoughts, yelling right behind her forehead. Now, it was weird to like a voice that wasn't screaming hate and regret, but at the same time it felt fitting. Now she didn't have a reason to be broody and regretful, with a beautiful lover by her side to enjoy life with. Exactly as it felt weird to be able to taste things, feel fresh water go down your throat when you're incredibly thirsty, your hands getting warmed up between the ones of someone you love. Even the flutter of her heart every time Laura looked at her smiling, felt weird. Wide, toothy, and so, so beautiful. Like everything she was.

Beside her, Laura felt forced to turn to her and smile at her girlfriend when the line 'I love you like no other' came up, but quickly noticed she was silently enjoying something that wasn't typically her style. Keeping her eyes on the road and with a grateful smile on her lips, she did her best to iron the moment in her brain.

Later that night, when they returned home and Carmilla's temple was on her collarbone, breath heavy on her neck, she did a quick research on her phone to find that song.

Even the title was fitting.

**Author's Note:**

> I have a couple more pieces for this.. thing that I'm doing. I should be able to post the next one in a few days, for a total of three or four pieces/chapters. In the meantime, thank you for reading, no matter if you enjoyed it or not. Whoever you are, wherever you are, I genuinely hope you have a nice day.
> 
> Also, English is not my first language, I might have declared war to a land of dragons somewhere in this, my bad, and all that stuff.
> 
> See you soon. :)
> 
> -D


End file.
